HUMOR What happens when you miss?

lol, I really don't know. But when I watched the TCW Malevolence episodes I wondered: "What the hell happens with that Ion shot when they miss the target?". Yeah, it's a pretty difficult question.

 

Never fear, Professor Nerfect's here!

First, the Malevolence question. An Ion Cannon shoots electrically charged atoms or molecules. The charges work like an electro-magnetic pulse (EMP) - they don't actually do physical damage, but they will short out any electrical systems they hit. The Jawas froze Artoo with an ion gun, and the big ion cannon on Hoth temporarily put a Star Destroyer out of action. But what if a shot from a large ion cannon missed?

Don't worry, we're safe. Probably.

First, we don't know exactly where in the Universe the Star Wars Galaxy is, but the nearest galaxy, the Sagittarius Dwarf Elliptical Galaxy, is 70,000 light years away. Of course, Star Wars happened a long time ago, so it's possible that the Malevolence fired it's ion cannon this direction 70,698 years and 28 days ago, and if those ions were cooking along at 99% if the speed of light, they could hit us sometime around December 19, 2015, threatening movie theaters everywhere. Bummer!

But even if that happened, we'd be unaffected. Ions lose their charge when they interact with other molecules, so an ion cannon couldn't penetrate the atmosphere, even if the beams went straight. But ion beams don't go straight. Inertia would keep a massive object moving on a straight path through empty space, but a charged particle is likely to be buffered by forces that are much stronger than gravity and interia. Very few ions would survive the solar winds and zero point energy fields between the Sagittarius Dwarf Elliptical Galaxy and here. Radioactive decay over 70,000 years would render almost all of the remaining ions ineffective.

But what about a blaster bolt?

Honestly, I don't know. I taught calculus, not physics. I know a blaster bolt could reach us, because lasers travel through empty space with extremely little refraction. A 70,000 light year trip through space wouldn't hurt a laser beam as much as the last couple miles travelling through Earth's atmosphere. So yes, a stray blaster bolt could undoubtedly reach us, and the diameter of the bolt might be very close to the same diameter of the blaster barrel, meaning the energy of the blaster wouldn't be spread so thin as to be just a warm, red light.

But here's the part I don't know: Would the energy survive the trip? Or would 70,000 years in the freezing depth of outer space drain the energy out of the blaster bolt? Going by what little bit of physics I know, it shouldn't. But common sense tells me 70,000 years in deep space is long enough to drain the heat out of anything else, so why not a laser?

Any physics majors out there? I'm too lazy to google the answer.

 

This is truly an original thread and very entertaining. LOL

I'll have to give it some thought and get back with a quality answer worthy of the discussion.

 

This could be a real scarry question if the Death Star ever missed...

 

What do you think the Force is? It's just stray lasers and Ion particles.