Featured GAME [Interactive Comic] Old Republic Paint Adventures

You INSTINCTIVELY react and try to NEUTRALIZE the BACKGROUND CREEP who has been INCESSANTLY trying to SHOOT YOU and the UNSUSPECTING PATRONS.



STAN. You just killed the CAMERA MAN.

POOR GUY was just TRYING to SHOOT this SCENE, but now you DONE KRIFFED UP the SHOOTING SCHEDULE for TODAY. THANKFULLY, since this is HOLLYWOOD, CAMERA MEN are ultimately DISPENSABLE and his DEMISE will be a SUPERFLUOUS LOSS in the LONG RUN.



No, you WON'T be STICKING to the SCRIPT!

You are MAN. THE STANDALORIAN. Your STANDALONE STORYLINE will not be SUBJECT to this DISCOUNT TIMOTHY ZAHN PLOTLINE. You, STANDARD FETT, choose something ELSE! Something completely IRRELEVANT and UNCOMPELLING!



You decide to ORDER some HONOURE STRUDELS from PAL MAL, even though your ORIGINAL ORDER from PAL POUTINE has YET to ARRIVE.

Hear that? That's the STORY coming to a COMPLETE HALT. Not to worry, though, you are DEFINITELY heading towards the end of the SECOND ACT. Yep. We are DEFINITELY HEADING THERE. One. Panel. At. A. Time.



Out of all these JUICY SIDE QUESTS, you pick out literally the most INCONSEQUENTIAL and SECONDARY one of the BUNCH, because you're a PLOT SADIST. It wasn't enough that you RUIN the PACING of this ACT with your BOTHERSOME INTRODUCTORY CHAPTER, no, you had to make an ABORTION of your own PLOTLINE as well.

The VEGAN LADY introduces herself as OCEAN, one of the DUMBEST NAMES you've ever heard. Although there was that one random SITH LORD back on NAR SHADDAA... what was his name? SWORD? SLICE? SCYTHE?

Scratch that. That last one is AWESOME. You're definitely KEEPING IT for yourself should you ever decide to give KORRIBAN a TRY.



STAN: "So, what are your terrible woes, my salad eating friend?"
OCEAN: "Why are you talking like that?"
STAN: "I like to be dramatic from time to time."
OCEAN: "Okay..."

STAN: "Well? Can I help you with something?"
OCEAN: "I don't know if I can trust you."
STAN: "I'm a Jedi."
OCEAN: "I can see that."
STAN: "I am also a Mandalorian."
OCEAN: "That's not helping."

STAN: "Then tell me what is."
OCEAN: "Nothing."
STAN: "I am nothing."
OCEAN: "Look, I'm not even sure if you're qualified. I'm looking for someone specific."



GEE, what a FREAKING USEFUL ABILITY to HAVE, STAN.



OCEAN: "I fail to see how that's relevant."
STAN: "Listen, boob. I've had enough of your passive aggressive flirting. For the first and final time, I'm celibate. You can't have my hot body."
OCEAN: "...Excuse me?"

STAN: "Secondly... I'm drunk. I shan't hesitate to throw these pebbles at your pathetic excuse of a meal! Unless you're more forthcoming to me, of course."
OCEAN: "Okay, okay! You don't have to be such a total ass about it."
STAN: "Honoure is at stake here. Dramatic lightning."
OCEAN: "You do realize you said that out loud, right?"
STAN: "My mistakes are my own."

OCEAN: "You clearly have made lots of those, I see."
STAN: "What was that?"
OCEAN: "Just an observation."



OCEAN: "I'm looking for my tool."
STAN: "What kind of a tool?"
OCEAN: "An embarrassing one."
STAN: "When was the last place in which you saw this... tool?"
OCEAN: "At this very restaurant."

STAN: "Is this tool important?"
OCEAN: "Kinda."
STAN: "Do you think someone might have stolen the tool?"
OCEAN: "Possibly. I mean, my tool is missing."

STAN: "Okay. This seems like a simple job."
OCEAN: "Great! Can you stop with all that spinning? It's making me dizzy."
STAN: "...But it's fun."
OCEAN: "Depends on your mental age, really."



Wow, what a CURIOUS QUEST NAME. It's CERTAINLY NOT referencing ANYTHING this time around, right?



You have GAINED a LEVEL! If you're HEADING OUT into PLOT ALLEY, you need to be WELL PREPARED and APPROPRIATELY EQUIPPED.

You are now STANDARD FETT, the LEVEL 8 JEDI WATCHMAN, a STANDARD LEVEL for this TIME in the PLOT.



You are a BLANK SLATE. An EMPTY ATTRIBUTE SCREEN greets you, waiting to be GRACEFULLY FILLED. Also, A FINE ADDITION has been added to YOUR COLLECTION, the AGED TIHAAR distilled from VAROS FRUIT that BESALISK WREX gifted you in the previous update.

Since you are QUITE NEW to this, you have TEN POINTS to SPEND on the following seven categories: SABER, HEALTH, HONOURE, PEBBLES, LIES, TIHAAR, WISDOM. And yes, according to TRADITION, absolutely NONE of THESE will ever be EXPLAINED to you. You'll just have to WING IT. The HEAD VOICES can still only choose THREE POINTS, but all TEN will be SPENT in the end based on your CHOICES. Because choic-

Which attributes do you choose to increase?