THREAD FOR THOSE WHO HATED THE MOVIE

This got a troll and dislike rating. Says it all.

 

Time jump of 6 months to a year while in the scroll it says Rey has been training with Luke. Cut out the Canto Blight story in favor of Snoke backstory, more Kylo & Luke backstory, & First Order backstory.

Fixes the main problems I have seen regarding TLJ. Can't complain about Rey being too powerful if she's spent the last few months training with Luke.
Can't complain about Rey empathizing with Kylo a week after murdering Han.
Can't complain about not knowing who Snoke is
Can't complain about Luke thinking of killing his nephew if we have more of an idea why
Can't complain about the FO appearing out of nowhere if we find out how they came to power
Can't complain about Finn going from seriously injured to completely healed in a week.

 

I guess that makes your opinion right? That's what you are trying to say isn't it? That's why the haters thread is full of links to Youtubers that made hate videos right?
Nobody is posting videos of positive reviews or all of the critics reviews in the other thread. Do you know why? Because we don't need affirmation from others. We loved it. Time to move on to IX.

OR it could be because the haters are so traumatized that they didn't like or understand a movie that they need a safe space to whine incessantly about something they cannot control - despite the fact that none of them can agree on what they actually hated.

 

Slow down.

Why is Luke on Ahch-To and why didn't he help his friends during the events of TFA?

 

Because he's in exile due to his failure with the Academy. I assume he doesn't help his friends because he thinks he does more harm than good. Makes perfect sense to me. I had issues with TLJ, but Luke's story line was not one of them for me

 

Riiiiight...so then how come Rey is training under him for 6 months?

 

HATERS THREAD OPENING CRAWL

It is now six months since Luke Skywalker took the Light Saber from Rey.
Upon realizing he was just being a dick for not helping the galaxy,
he decided to train Rey in the ways of the Force. Rey did not expect Master
Skywalker's training to be so grueling as he has made her carry him around
on his back for the past six months while doing flips and making rocks float.

Meanwhile, Supreme Leader Snoke has summoned his apprentice, Kylo Ren
to chastise him for losing to a girl that has never held a light saber. After
his tongue lashing, Snoke went on a long diatribe about how he didn't
resurrect himself from Darth Plagueis grave just to have another Skywalker
decedent screw up his plans for galaxy domination.

Since the destruction of Starkiller, the Resistance has evacuated to an
abandoned Rebel base and has lived there in peace for the last six months
while Rey has been training up. They had a lovely funeral for Han Solo,
even Lando came. Now they are secretly recruiting allies that
can help defeat the First Order once and for all.

Finn just woke up....

 

Haha! And that's the short version!

 

Nope. But then there isn't much, if anything, to love about this repellant film. So, it's not that surprising despite delusional protestations to the contrary. LOL.

 

Uhh for the exact same reason she "trains" under him in the actual story.....just, you know, for more than 2 lessons over the course of like 3 days

 

So he's on Ahch-To because he's all depressed about the Jedi and his failings. So much so he didn't bother helping his friends and sister in TFA. And then Rey arrives and at some point he decides to train her but we don't witness this huge turn of events? Nor do we see what became of Ren when he was summoned by Snoke after his failings?

Come on man, can't you see how your version doesn't weigh up against what RJ did?
He had to start the film immediately and deal with why Luke was on the Island. You can't just suddenly start the film 6 months later with everything being hunky dory and then tell the audience that Luke was depressed but he is ok now.

 

Your first mistake were the words "Can't complain". If there is one thing Star Wars fans CAN do, it's complain... a lot.

 

Luke can still be depressed and reluctant to train Rey. I mean seriously...all we got out of the RJ version was her following him around for 10 minutes asking to be trained before he's like "fine, I'll show you why the Jedi need to end" Also can still have Snoke mocking Kylo. He mocked him in TFA too, not like it's a big stretch to believe he's still mocking him 6 months later.

You're telling me you wouldn't trade the lightsaber toss with 10 minutes of Rey asking to be trained before he actually does it for not having to listen to all these people having issues with Rey's lack of training?

Fair point. But I don't think the complaints would be as widespread

 

I don't understand your story.
Luke is in exile and didn't help his friends. We don't see Rey arrive but at some point Luke agreed to train her...but then is still depressed and reulctant and doesn't really train her...

You've lost me. I think you're beginning to see why RJ did what he did.

No because then we'd be left with the confusing story you're suggesting above, a story that doesn't make any sense. Besides, if RJ did what you say and started the film 6 months on, then those people would just find something else to moan about - this time though they'd have good reason and the story wouldn't make sense.

 

We do see Rey arrive at the end of TFA..........

He's still depressed and reluctant when he begins to train her in TLJ. I must have missed the part where he enthusiastically begins to train her. There's no reason after 6 months he can't still be weary of training her. Hell...the Jedi Council was weary of training Anakin for 3 movies

 

The irony of it all. @TheTruTru rated my crawl as UNORIGINAL.

 

Because your constant mockery of others opinions has become tiresome &.....unoriginal

 

But you're suggesting that Luke suddenly decided to train her and we didn't see his change of heart. No build up to him refusing to train her (which explains why he didn't rescue his friends in TFA). No sign of him being told about what happened to Han. No Artoo Leia projection that convinced him to explain to Rey WHY SHE SHOULDN'T BE A JEDI.

You're just going with: She arrived, he sort of told her why she shouldn't be a Jedi (which he had to be persuaded to do somehow) but didn't actually train her - no explanation for this but this 6 months of Rey being on Ahch-To doing nothing whilst the Resistance hides and Finn is in a coma...

It doesn't make sense. RJ's story did.

 

You want us to write a fan fic of what happens after TFA? People can do that, but understand that people's dislike for the film is not based on them wanting to have written the story themselves.

 

I think it would be better like this...

Luke: "Lesson one, I need you to milk that beast"
Rey: "How is that Jedi training?"
Luke: "Who's the Jedi Master here Mary Sue?"
Rey: "Would you please stop calling me that - you scruffy looking Moof Milker. That is a Moof right?"
Luke: "That is why you fail"

Lighten up man. It's all in good fun.