HUMOR Official Porg Cookbook 1.0 - Post your Recipes

I tried them. Tastes similar to squirrel brains!

 

Ohh i make awesome Porg jerky. You take the tenderloin and slice with or against the grain however you prefer. Marinade over night in Soy Veh soy sauce fantastic stuff. Preheat the oven at 170F degrees hang them on a wire rack for 4 hours. Fantastic.

 

Oh, oh, oh, Mike Zeroh here. You have uncovered a leak that only I had known about, but I will spill that recipe anyway cause I'm never wrong.

1. 3lbs of Dewback lizards from Tatooine
2. A sliver of Rancor eye ball
3. The underbelly meat of a Rathar. Just a smidge
4. A cup of Jawa Juice
5. 1/2 cup of Bluemilk
6. For spiciness add the deadmens bones from the Sarlaac
7. Of course a whole fattened Porg

You gotta mix ingredients and the put in dehydrator for an 12 hours and then add your favorite veggies from the Subway bar.

Coming December, 2017 the $6 ft long at your favorite participating Subway near you. Promotional coupons available. Don't forget to tell them The Zeroh sent you for half off meal.

 

I am going to legit tell them that you sent me.

 

Porg Sausages

These gamey and low-fat tender Porg Sausages are a favorite at most Canto Bight Casinos and now you can make them yourself!

You will need:

-10-15 feet of thoroughly washed Taun Taun intestines (for the sausage casings---the smell comes out when rinsed)
-1 gram of ground Japor Snippet
-2 large unfertilized Porg eggs
-2 tablespoons of Kessel Spice
-2 pounds of ground Porg breast
-A Sausage Processing Device (you can find these at places like Toshe Station on Tatooine)

Step 1: Mix Japor, eggs, spice, and Porg meat together. DO NOT OVERWORK THE MEAT. This may cause the finished product to be dry and stringy. Place in cooling unit until chilled.


Step 2: Prepare the Taun Taun casings by bunching them up on the Sausage Processing Device feed tube according to the readout on your device. If you need assistance an astromech can help direct you at this stage.


Step 3: Initiate the device's motivator and begin feeding the meat mixture through slowly. Be ready at the feed tube to twist the sausages into links at the desired length. Do this until all of the meat mixture is gone. Tie the Taun Taun intestine off at the end of the last sausage.


Step 4: Cook the sausages any way you like! I suggest slow cooking over a thermal particle emitter.

Step 5: Enjoy!

 

That looks so tasty

 

I like the hint of manure. It gives it an earthy taste!

 

Tuan taun intestine for breakfast, for lunch and dinner doesn’t that make you say yum? Lol

 

You know what? Don’t clean the intestines it tastes better that way.

 

Yum yum yum!

 

Chewy Porg Skewers!

Step 1: Get the fluffy, adorable porg and make it eat grains until it gets so bloated that it can’t see its own feet

Step 2: grab the porg by the head and let it first squawk before you behead it

Step 3: debone the porg and give it’s bones to your pet Loth Wolf and then pull out the porg intestines and save those for later for sausage casing.

Step 4: then grab the dead porg and turn it into strips.

Step 5: get a bell pepper and slice it and and a pineapple and cut it into small 4 inch cubes.

Step 6: get a grill and let it start heating up and put the pineapple cubes, the bell pepper slices, and the porg slices on to metal skewers.

Step 7: grill them for 40 minutes then place them in a China plate and cover it in honey mustard.

Step 8: and there you have it Chewy Porg skewers! Enjoy your skewers!

 

Hahahahaha! Love it.
With the head, you could pop out those big porg eyes marinate them in vinegar and sugar. Cut the tongue out fry it up in a pan with onions and peppers. Roast the whole head. Smash the little porg skull open and saute the brains. Thats a good porg lunch.

 

.... I am not even going to comment on anything u just said lol

 

If squirrel brains are good, why not porg brains?

 

Hey if fish eyes are edible and tasty then porg eyes must be edible and tasty too!

 

Well I guess it’s time for another Star Wars recipe. You guys got any ideas?

 

Porg stuffed with blue milk, an Old Uncle Luke recipe, between tradition and modernity.

 

For vegetarians like myself:

Deep fried "Porgfu":

1 block of firm tofu
1/2 cup Vegetable stock
1/2 cup Moof milk
Flour (for batter)
2 dried Root leaves